As of March 2010...

As of the first 3 months of 2010..

I have lost 2 people I cherished.
One was through a misunderstanding/small mistake,
The other was by death.

As of the first 3 months of 2010..
I have been questioning myself in terms of my characteristics/ bad habits
I am filled with regret for not being able to see Nenibe after 9 years
I am disgusted with myself for not being a better daughter, for not appreciating my parents
although circumstances require me to stop procrastinating
Nenibe's unwavering faith in God before her death convicted me to the core.
I cannot read updates from my cousins without shedding a tear.

As of the first 3 months of 2010..
I am once again afraid of growing old alone.
I chose to shut myself away and to not update friends on my current well being
I feel I am or may be a burden to them should I start talking about myself
This I have only updated a few if not a handful.

I am tired.

Amidst of the painful chaos, perhaps the optimistic side of me would quip 'Yaay, I've drastically lost weight'?