Sunday, October 25, 2009

Fix me, Lord.

Dear Lord,



Please fix me.



I am pleading for you to fix my low self esteem and confidence. I acknowledge that this is one of my biggest flaws that can never seem to be improved on. You have thrown at me situations that test my confidence yet I seem to fail each of these tests over and over again. I do not know when will I ever learn from my mistakes although I know where I went wrong. In fact, I do not know of any other improved ways to switch my mindset and make it sustainable. At one moment, I feel confident in terms of my physique, intelligence, talents, and 'sweet' personality. But that soon takes a 180 degree change and my confidence drops to a negative to zero value.



The test you threw at me during the Speedzone Tour 2009 was enough to make me realize that I do not have sufficient energy on my own to sustain a mindset filled with absolute confidence and socialable skills. My low self-esteem created a domino effect by fueling a sense of insecurity which then led to slight possessiveness which in turn wrecked part of my weekend as I became emotional. Perhaps, the reason why I could not sustain my level of confidence to a optimum peak is because I cannot do this on my own... I need Your energy/help.



Please, Lord... I plead for you fix me.